TheMarioseries is full of delightful scoundrels and cute rapscallions. Yes, they want to murder a plumber trying to save a woman from the clutches of a terrifying monster, but we still can’t help but say “awwwwww” every time we see most of them.
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Despite the fact that so much as touching most of these lil guys is lethal, we can’t help but wish we could go in for a cuddle. The question remains though, which dastardly bad guy in the Mushroom Kingdom is the cutest of them all?
19Cat Goomba
Some people love Cat Goombas, and we can hardly blame them. The way they waddle around is reminiscent of a kitten still getting its feet under them, and they are basically a big ball of fluff.
However, the more we think about them the more we worry. What kind of sick genetic hybrid are they? A nightmare synthesis between fungi and feline. Did they even choose to be like this? One shudders to contemplate the implications.
18Nabbit
Nabbit is pretty cute, especially considering we have gone from chasing this baby burglar to getting to play as them. What’s more, when we play as them, we can usually survive any attacks or damages that Mario and Co. would find fatal.
But we have to wonder, what exactly is a Nabbit? I mean, look at it. Really look at it. Is it a rabbit? Why is it purple? Why is it wearing shoes? Why is it hiding its face with Bowser Junior’s mask? What the hell is going on here?
17Blooper
Bloopers are adorable. Their name may be the most satisfying to say in all of Mario cannon. However, we cannot in good conscience rank it any higher in this list, because they are so damn annoying.
If you have played the original Super Mario Bros. on the NES, you will definitely agree. Despite their predictable pattern and the fact they will never go below you, they seem to always know the exact right place to position themselves so that you swim into them.
16Cheep Cheep
Cheep Cheeps, much like Bloopers, are undeniably cute as hell. They are, after all, basically just chibi fish, however, much like Bloopers they can’t go too high on this list because of just how much frustration they have caused us over the years.
Maybe we are being harsh andjust can’t stand underwater levels,but Cheep Cheeps, also bring their regime of terror out of the water and will jump at Mario as he runs across bridges. They are truly an unruly terror.
15Torpedo Ted
Bullets, let’s face it, will only ever be so cute. Bullet Bills' steely-eyed determinism spending their brief existence going from right to left in the hope that they might hit a plumber before they themselves hit a wall and die is admirable.
However, there is something about the underwater variants that seems much less imposing. Maybe it’s the little propeller, or maybe it’s the more pronounced stubby arms, which are, frankly, of no use, but for whatever reason Teds just seem like cool guys.
14Whomp, Thwomp, And Thwimp
All three of these species live simple lives. They try to fall on Mario, and occasionally they go, “UUUUURRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHH!”
If we had to pick one as the cutest it would probably be the less-lethal Thwimps. Partly because those little rocks are such small guys doing little hops back and forth, and partly because you can spin jump on them for some cool jumps.
13Flying Buzzy Beetle
Buzzy Beetles are just hapless little dudes. They have a one-track mind and will keep walking even if it means plummeting straight off a ledge.
However, the best type of Buzzy Beetle has to be the fellas that have taken to the sky. They are the most unlikely of platforms and will do their best to try to help Mario get higher and higher if they feel him on their back.
12Giant Chain Chomp
If we’re honest, Chain Chomps are hardly enemies; they’re basically over-excited puppies, looking for affection from Mario.
That means that Giant Chain Chomps are basically the Mario equivalent of an over-excited Labrador that doesn’t realise its own size. Yes, they might hurt you when they jump up on you, be deep down we know they didn’t mean it.
11Wiggler
They are literally worms with legs that still manage to wiggle when they walk. What is not to love?
These little fellas should be celebrated every Wiggler Wednesday for just how darn cute they are.
10Angry Wiggler
Okay, it might be rude to jump on sentient creatures, but these guys get so adorable when they get worked up. I mean,awwww,the angry little fella thinks he can hurt us while we hop along his back!
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What a dude of a guy! What a guy of a fella! What a fella of a pal!
